This is a tip for al bosses out there: your employees CAN't know that you shit! Especially not how bad it stinks. So if you have a private office but no private bathroom and don't want to lose your power and authority, follow my tips! 

I show you why all the mugs go missing from the office. I'm taking them into my private office and shitting in them, then taking them home to dispose of - it's pretty devious and that way I don't ever stink up the employee bathroom ;) 

You'd never suspect this put-together business woman has a dirty secret and an even dirtier asshole xoxo